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my Life. right there, on the table, for you to See.
for me to Share. for all to Know.
to keep me at Ease. to keep me Sane.
to keep it Real........ One post at a time.

...i will be chasing your starlight...

Wednesday, September 26, 2007

well cross my heart and hope to...

...so reckless, so, so thoughtless

just fall back
fall out
fall away
and fall back down again.
and don't think i'd ever get up again.
waking up with a hangover every morning isn't the way to go.
first instinct: i'm as sober as a fucking nun.
there's a reason god made headboards,
you wouldn't want dents in your walls.
i wake up saying TGIF hoping id be right.
insomnia has vanished, and i fucking hate it.
i live in fear of my bed suffocating me,
like that couch in The Bird And The Worm music video by The Used.
anywheres better then here.
i haven't had a dream in ages.
sadly enough i've lost all thought or care in this world.
its sad to have to hide behind a mask.
my friends have noticed,
(constantly thanking you god)
and i need to learn to actually show my anger and sadness.
you'll be the first to know if i finally snap.
last night, i heard the rain fall onto the glass windows.
last night, i fell asleep, and wanted to get up the next morning.
last night, i felt real.
last night, i had a dream.

.so careless, i could care less.

the ending was really "Martin Luther King Jr"-ish.
and at the moment, i have... 23 minutes of my birthday left.
that's right, i'm officially 15.
thank fucking god.
...i feel no different.
news? i'm auditioning for musical theatre.
my fingers are callused from guitar.
my life as we know it is gone.
and i'm in no mood for anything else.
goodnight to all, or have an awesome day.

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