stuck on a rollercoaster and can't get off this ride

and i'm just a girl
with tired feet and an aching neck
whose been kicked to a curb
so many times before.

call me WHIPLASHGIRL
rawrr night

...

but in all seriousness
just stick with DeathOfBEAUTYY

when you're gone, will i lose control?

you're the only road i know, show me where to go

step by step
and i don't look back
no looking back. no turning back.
step by step
and i lose my place.
the surroundings look the same
to my untrained eyes
i've been down this road
i know it i know it.
i've seen it all before.
step by step
i'm slowly turning back.
not this road. not this time.
i turn around. fork in the road.
i've been down this road
i know it i know it
the surroundings look the same to my untrained eyes.
and i need the guiding hands. my northern star.
step by step
i follow the path.
my feet take me where no one would dare go before.
twists and turns
an emotional whiplash
an emotional journey
an emotional wreck
step by step
i'm an EMOTIONAL WRECK

.who will drive my soul?.
the bolded title and lyrics is Drive My Soul by Lights
andd the song speaks for me...
i think i'm losing control

who tends to pretend that he's concerned...

...says "girly girly you're at your best when you're sober"

with eyes so cold it could freeze the sun
with a heart so hollow you can hear the echoing beats
and it makes her wonder
who is real to her?
talk about trust and lies
and love through passed drinks
that can blur ones mind and vision
of what can truly be seen.
talk about truth and rely
but she was just a pawn in a game
for ones own enjoyment.
she learned to trust him
but she was a pawn
through the bet and passed drinks
she was just some prize to be won.
she woke up with a headrush
and she heard some strange news
through drinks passed by would-be friends
she had almost been used.
3 years of a friendship
though that ship has been sunk
he placed his bets on a girl
who was obviously drunk...
every friend has an end
but were you ever a friend of mine?

.and she slurs "no no just one more" then one turns into four, the fourth drink instinct has taken over and the gentleman is leading her towards the door.

the bolded title and lyrics is The Fourth Drink Instinct by Cute Is What We Aim For
...
its amazing how someone you thought was your friend
could be the exact opposite of what you thought him to be.
and what makes it worse is that one of my only drunken experiences could have all been placed on a bit of cash...
...and some wonder why i have trust issues...
.real eyes. realize. real lies.
-DEATH.Of.beauty...

oh and i love it allll!!

This song is called 6 Months by a new band i discovered called Hey Monday. They're pretty good, and this song is just the cutest song ever.

And I love how i can relate to it :)

You're the direction I follow to get home

When I feel like I can't go on, you tell me to go

And it's like I can't feel a thing without you around

And don't mind me if I get weak in the knees'

Cause you have that effect on me, you do

Everything you say

Every time we kiss, I can't think straight

But I'm okayAnd I can't think of anybody else

Who I hate to miss as much as I hate missing you

Months going strong now, and no goodbye

Unconditional, unoriginal

Always by my side

Meant to be together

Meant for no one but each other

You love me, I love you harder so

Everything you say

Every time we kiss, I can't think straight

But I'm okayAnd I can't think of anybody else

Who I hate to miss as much as I hate missing you

So please, give me your hands

So please, give me a lesson on how to steal, steal the heart

As fast as you stole mine, as you stole mine

Oh and everything you say

Every time we kiss, I can't think straight

But I'm okayAnd I can't think of anybody else

Who I hate to miss as much as I hate missing you

So please, give me your hands

So please, just take my hand.

I LOVE IT HAHA

xoxo

dOb

the grass is damp
its dark
its cold
that once clear sky
its grey
its old
look up once
look up twice
thinking thinking
what a damn fool...
and the oxygen is drowning me
its hard to speak, i'm feeling weak
try to stand, knees buckle
lean back into the new breeze
i see the horizon
i see a sunrise
lean back into the new breeze
closes eyes,
lay down my head
dreaming, dreaming
i want to dream of you

dream every night that one will come true...

...but only bad ones ever do

and now i fear to blink.
demons and fears,
past, present and future
haunt these eyelids, taunting and torturing.
like pins and needles when your foot is asleep.
wake up Wake Up WAKE UP.
paranoia sinks in, what does it mean
what does it mean?!
going in circles
hallways with no end
i slip and fall
crash and burn
but whos really watching?
crash and burn
i slip and fall
hallways with no end
fuck im going in circles.
here i read the old hallway dream
from the hummingbirds and bumblebees
and i still wonder...
what did it all mean?

.won't let it pass me by again.
the title and bolded lyrics are Out Through The Curtain by The Hush Sound
and i have had the dreams again
not the ones that make you feel all giddy
but ones that make you wake up in a cold sweat
darnnnnnn

DeatH OF BeautY~~

FUCK WRITERS BLOCK

You only hold me up like this
Cause you don't know who I really am
Sometimes I just want to know what it's like to be you
We're making out inside crashed cars
We're sleeping through all our memories
I used to waste my time dreaming of being alive
(now I only waste it dreaming of you)
Turn off the lights and turn off the shyness
Cause all of our moves make up for the silence
Like I'll never be the same

You only hold me up like this
Cause you don't know who I really am
I used to waste my time on
Waste my time on
Waste my time dreaming of being alive
(now I only waste it dreaming of you)
Turn off the lights and turn off the shyness
Cause all of our moves make up for the silence
Like I'll never be the same

I've got headaches and bad luck but they couldn't touch you, no
I've got headaches and bad luck but they couldn't touch you, no
I'm not tryingYou only hold me up like this

Turn off the lights and turn off the shyness
Cause all of our moves make up for the silence
Like I'll never be the same

i guess life cant get any better then this!

when two of a kind collide.

i heard what you were saying but it all lies

used me, lose me goodbye



i'm drowning out the past with the speakers

but the ghosts draw near and near

i'm closing out your voice and al these fears

but i just can't leave it beahind



so goodbye, goodbye goodbye

take it all away

bring me back to the safe place

in your arms where i'm alvie

take it all away

bring me thoughts of the good times

where all we did

blech

It sucks that the only thing thats actually making me look forward to Florida is the major shopping spree in Hot Topic and other US stores that I like.
But it sucks that I'm going away from everyone... seems like there's going to be something going on, and I will completely miss it.
Out of the loop.
At least I'll be home for New Years, and get my New Years kiss... yay hahaha
Writers Block is eating away at my soullll
And I have no idea what to do!!
...
except yell at myself through blogpost
...
that's always fun
GAHHHHHH
Kay I'll try to post later, but it's doubtful
ciao

dOb

please come now i think i'm falling, i'm holding to all i think is safe...

...it seems i found the road to nowhere

sometimes i wish i could close my eyes forever
because the best things in life are unseen.
well i guess that's why we close our eyes when we dream.
that's why we close our eyes when we kiss.
that's why darkness, is not a bad thing.
to achieve the impossible dream, i try sleeping.
its my own reality, or lack thereof.
sometimes i wish i could close my eyes forever
but i'm too afraid of hitting something on the way out.
sometimes i wish i could close my eyes forever
but i'm too afraid of missing whats right there in the open.
sometimes i wish i could close my eyes forever
but i just dont want to miss a thing.
i dont want to skip a moment,
a beat,
a cue.
i dont want to stay in my dream life,
because a life of dreams is not a world at all.
it's a state of mind, its just what you make it to be.
life is a joke, you have to make fun of it to make the best of it.
life is a battle, you have to fight to make it through the day.
life is planned out for us, and it's what you make it.
a dream life would be a wonderless life,
wheres the life in that?
sometimes i wish i could close my eyes forever
but i would miss the life i left behind.
life is about making a choice,
and making the best of it.
you only live once.
make it all count.

. and i'm trying to escape.
the bolded title and lyrics are from One Last Breath by Creed
i'm actually dying of writers block
so i decided to go into the archives
and i pulled that out from September 19, 2007
ive grown to really like it... because i wrote something happy
during what i remember to be a really tough time for me
so it was like my silver lining
and to this day, i can still relate to this
so, yay =D
thats all for now, enjoy!!!

XoXo
DeaTHoFBeauTY

boysboysboysboysboys

boys are so hormonal
boys are so greedy

boys are so insane

boys are so funny
boys are so cute
boys are so fun
boys like prizes
boys read this
boys see this
one boy sees this
you know who you are
i laugh i laugh
im tired goodnight

the sea is wine red
this is the
DEATHofbeauuTYYY
...hushhhhsounds

cant read my poker face...

its funny how some people claim
"i can read you like a book"
through my eyes my emotions can't hide..
sure you can read me
but is that what i feel?
who says im actually happy?
who says im actually upset?
i can make it seem so
...
but it doesnt mean it is so.
eyes of steel
hearts of glass
bodies of straw and hay.
take me apart
and put me back together
and suddenly ill turn to gray.
im not sensitive, im just a pessimist
because it seems everything close
loves, leaves, and lies
im sleepwaking, calling your name
with arms wide open
grasping something out of my reach
and my dreams lead me into a new domain
where i live alone and empty
inside and out...
look in my eyes
my damn blue eyes
and tell me how i really feel